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Description
Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World MythologyFrom the creator of Myths Retold comes a hilarious collection of Greek, Norse, Chinese and even Sumerian myths retold in their purest, bawdiest forms All our lives, we've been fed watered down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O'Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD , sets the stories straight.
From the creator of Myths Retold comes a hilarious collection of Greek, Norse, Chinese and even Sumerian myths retold in their purest, bawdiest forms All our lives, we've been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified...wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O'Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD , sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Did you know? Cronus liked to eat babies. Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate. Odin got construction discounts with bestiality. Isis had bad taste in jewelry. Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy. And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face. Still skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider: - Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed. - The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone. - The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties...on the corpses of their enemies. - The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there's more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.Binding Type: Paperback
Publisher: Tarcherperigee
Published: 03/05/2013
ISBN: 9780399160400
Pages: 289
Weight: 0.55lbs
Size: 7.90h x 4.40w x 0.70d
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4.9 ★★★★★
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Product Reviews
★★★★★ 5
Worth the money
Size: Medium (Pack of 2), Color: Assorted
I've had several sizes of Chuck-It ball launchers for years but had resisted buying the balls to go with them because I had about 50 tennis balls already that cost only pennies apiece and these were quite a bit more expensive. But, I got tired of the dogs chewing up the tennis balls. I'd start a ball throwing session with a brand new ball and for the first few throws it would sail through the air and the dogs would have to work to retrieve it. However on the way back, their jaws would work it, chomp-chomp-chomp. And when they returned to me, they'd want to stand there and chomp some more, despite my command to "Drop it!" Within 30 minutes, the brand new ball would have a hole in it and then instead of sailing several football fields through the air, then bouncing over a couple of trees, I'd throw it and it would piddle unenthusiastically to the end of the driveway before falling to the ground with a sulky thud, not even bothering to bounce.
So - I finally grew tired of going through a ball every time I play with the dogs - which is everyday - and ordered these chuck-it balls. They are the same size as a tennis ball but made of a rubber-like material (not silicone) and after several months of use, have no wear and tear on them at all. The dogs can exercise their gums on them all the way back to me - throw after throw - and the ball still flies the same distance each time, and bounces satisfyingly upon contact with the ground.
The description says "colors may vary" but the first packet I ordered were blue and orange as pictured. Unfortunately my dog lost the orange one the first time we used it. She got thirsty and ran down to our pond for a drink, dropped the ball in the pond and it hasn't been seen since. It is dense enough it doesn't float as a tennis ball might, and by now is probably so covered in mud and slime that I wouldn't recognize it if I tripped over it. Lesson learned: we don't throw the ball in the pond pasture any more.
After losing the orange ball, I ordered a second packet of the balls so that I would always have a spare. The second packet is also blue and orange. So while colors may vary, in my experience so far, they haven't (which doesn't matter to me or the dogs).
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Reviewed in the United States on March 1, 2015
★★★★★ 5
Super Chewer Friendly!!
Size: Large (Pack of 1), Color: Multi
This ball is perfect for the super Chewer!! It is squishy and durable rubber that stands up to the aggressive chewer. It does not squeak. It has great bounce and is a great toy for fetch. Very cute to watching my pup bring the ball back for another throw. The rubber doesn't stick or have an average powering smell. It smells just like a rubber ball. It is highly functional for a great game of fetch! Highly recommend and very happy with our purchase. It is well worth the price. We will be ordering more.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 20, 2025
★★★★★ 5
My dog LOVES these balls
Awesome balls! Soft, squishy, and dog can get their teeth into them but they don’t get damaged. My dog absolutely loves them!
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Reviewed in the United States on January 6, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Durable.
These are great for my 13 lb Schnauzer. Just the right size to keep him occupied! He loves chasing after them when we play catch. They’ve held up well to his sharp teeth.
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Reviewed in the United States on July 21, 2025
★★★★★ 5
Nice design
These balls are wonderful, easy to throw and my puppy can hold on to them
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Reviewed in the United States on November 23, 2025
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